The Dapper Lad

It’s May Day. That wistful time when we think about the past, contemplate the future, and love each and every person like the joyous individual that they are.

Here’s what I looked like when I was 8. Love me!

AP–The Commerce Department reported Thursday that consumer spending was up 0.4 percent, double the increase that economists had forecast.

Great job America. We are staring into the belly of the worst economic period in years, and yet Americans are sucking it up, and moving forward to push this country back to the top of the mountain.

Soaring prices for food, gas and other everyday needs pushed consumer spending to a faster pace than expected in March.

Well, sure that’s not the best reason for an increase in spending, however, let’s look at the glass as half full…okay a tenth full, and call it a day.

However, once inflation was removed, spending edged up a much slower 0.1 percent. The March figures represent the fourth straight lackluster performance as consumers have been battered by record gasoline prices, a deep slump in housing and rising job layoffs.

Okay, we get it, Americans are f-ed.

The great part about going to a public university is being able to look up how much all your professors make.

Yesterday, Italians got to enjoy that experience, but for the whole country.

Thankfully, there are significant cultural differences between Italy and Seattle. Otherwise, there would be a shit storm of passive aggressive emails flying around the country for the rest of the week:

“Sergio is looking good today. Of course, he should be with what he makes…”

If anyone can read italian, please clue us in on what bloggers are saying about this over there. Do they have bloggers in Europe?

Lindsey Lohan, the media whore publicity machine, is at it again. The latest “news” is that she is planning to show full frontal nudity in an upcoming movie, in an attempt to appear as a “mature, responsible actress.”

What’s puzzling to us is that — well gosh, who hasn’t already seen Lindsey Lohan fully nude? It’s not like the nation is demanding to see more of Lohan’s body. I don’t know how much of a boon this is going to be to the film or to Lohan’s career. But Lohan’s spinning this like it’s some kind of Haley’s Comet of Nudity — as if it happens so rarely, it’s news worthy.

Heck, she appeared nude just last month in New York Magazine. I don’t think a month has gone by where we haven’t stumbled across a nude photo of Lindsey Lohan. Seeing her nude is like finding a dollar in the gutter. Big deal.

In fact, and we rarely say this about anyone, we’ve seen more of her than we care to acknowledge. (Don’t click this link if you’re at work.)

Now, if this was Emma Watson we were talking about… then maybe we’d consider this news worthy. (Hey, back off — she turned 18 last month. F you for judging us.)

Welcome to beautiful Boulder, CO. Yesterday it was 84 balmy degrees. But as night fell, clouds came over the mountains, and we woke this morning to nature’s shit storm: rainy snow.

On average, this happens weekly. We have a beautiful, sunny, warm day, and the next is cold and snowy. Then we slowly get back to warm and sunny, only to have it snow again. At this rate, my flight to New York in June might very well get delayed due to weather. 

So yeah, happy f-ing May Day. Scarves and sweaters it is!

Brothers and sisters, today is our day!

Today is the day we break the chains cast upon us by big business and corporate greed.

Workers of the world, WE are the ones with the true POWER!

Let us unite and show corporate executives, politicians and their lobbyists that it is time to acknowledge the people who actually get things done in this country.

The Revolution starts today. We will be holding a rally at 3pm in Read more »